If you’re an introvert ― or just hate small talk ― few things are more stress-inducing than a first date. Keeping conversation flowing freely is no easy feat.
To help you figure out what to talk about ahead of time, we asked therapists and psychologists who work with couples to share their favorite first date discussion points. See what they had to say below.
“Figure out some way to ask what makes your date proudest. You get to see your date light up and see them at their best. Common values are more important to a relationship than common interests and by asking this question, you get to find out what they really value in their life.” ― Isiah McKimmie, a couples therapist and sexologist in Melbourne, Australia
“You would be able to tell quite a lot from this question. For example, you’d be able to see how well they think on their feet, how playful or imaginative they are and you’d get a flavor for how worldly they are. Perhaps most obviously, you’d see who they admire, which would tell you if his or her values line up with yours. If they pick a political figure, it could tell you about how conservative or liberal they are. And asking what advice you’d be seeking tells you a lot about their goals in life.” ― Susan Pease Gadoua, a couples therapist and the co-author of The New I Do, Reshaping Marriage for Skeptics, Realists and Rebel